The Disappointments - The 5 Worst Beers of 2023

It is with a sense of responsibility that I return to write this list. These beers represent a failure of execution, desire and hope. A lack of sensibility and honesty, offensive to anyone who understands what it means to enjoy life...

Okay, maybe that's a bit harsh, but when it comes to bad beer, it just gets me riled up. Folks spend their hard earned money to purchase a product that promises one thing and the absolute drop off of quality and taste is stunning to witness, even more so in a world where dollars are being squeezed from all sides. People talk about breweries closing down and after some of these pints in 2023, I think a few more could follow the ones already mashed out and gone away.

  But what makes a bad beer? Of course, taste is subjective and all that jazz, I know folks who hate IPAs and would say any one of them is terrible. I don't mean personal preference, it's all about being true to style. Being what you say you are and not misleading consumers. There are poorly executed beers that just don't hit the mark and then we will see terrible beers that should have been drained from the tank and never sold to the public in the first place. I understand that businesses need to make money to stay open, but if you are going to sell sub standard and obviously off-flavoured and poor quality beer, then maybe you should rethink that business model, because eventually it will come back to you. Beer Karma can be a real thing...I hope.

 Onward we go now, the 5 Worst Beers that crossed my path in 2023.

5. Black Rapids Brewing Navigator Brut IPA

 

Why anyone in 2023 was brewing Brut IPA, let alone contract brewing one for LCBO release, is beyond me. The style never really took off and with very few exceptions, missed the desired profile qualifications every time. Maybe someone thought they were onto the next big thing or perhaps that they knew more than the beer drinking public, but this was not that.

What I said then (January 26th, 2023) :

  There was a reason Brut IPAs never really took off, and while I did find a couple of that style that were interesting enough to make me intrigued...it isn't the place to put your flagship pint....people just don't want 'em.

  Black Rapids Beer 4.9% Navigator IPA popped up in my local LC, and while it has notes of white grape, light citrus, berry, and that dry finish so desired by the style guide, it's not very effervescent, those flavours seem muted, and I'm left wondering what was happening here. It's a miss. Something about Brut IPAs makes them really tough to do well, and I'd rather they get a pass unless someone really gets deep into what makes them tick...Cheers! 2.5/5

Pints with Polk YouTube review : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHmWnfxnjCo&t=10s

4. Mudtown Station Lilly Dipper Lagered Ale

  

  There are few styles more abused than the Lagered Ale or Kolsch style. I shudder when I see a brewery lead with this because for the most part, they tend to lean into a thinly disguised, poorly executed blonde ale or lazy lagering that doesn't give the beer time to mature before hitting the canning line or taproom. It is one of my most adamantly held beliefs that most lagered ales are trash, but can be serviceable, with the odd one shining like a bright beacon on the hill, showing what it possible when time and commitment to quality are first and foremost in a brewers mind.

  This Owen Sound brew pub, more likely a restaurant with some brewing equipment trying cash in on the whole drink local thing, has delivered quite a few disappointing offerings that my wife so lovingly brought home for me when she visits her family in the area and while I do appreciate the gifts, I think she should just stop in Guelph on her way home and grab some quality pints from the amazing breweries there. 

What I said then (July 15th, 2023) :

  Muggy out here...#BeerMe

Mudtown Station 5% Lilly Dipper Lagered Ale brings not a lot to the table with a fast disappearing head to a sweetness that was off-putting. Neither smooth nor bubbly. It kind of just exists as a beer that maybe needs a little more time in the tank...cloying with no real bitterness or crispness, it feels more like a carling than anything else...meh...Onward we go.

Cheers! 1.5/5

Pints with Polk YouTube Review : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thPQWhXPvyU

3. Magnotta True North Light IPA

 

 There are not a lot of breweries that I avoid, I'm always about giving people a second chances in life and in beer. 

But.

Magnotta is a winery that bought my beloved Grand River Brewing a few years back and turned what was some really good, to style pints into another poorly made SKU at the LCBO. They have delivered many Top 5 Worst beer moment over the last few years and this soapy, weak session IPA was just another example of how out of their depth they really are when it comes to malted barley and hops. It somehow got worse the longer I drank it, in my video I actually didn't find it terrible at first, but by the time I got to writing about it a few minutes later, it had dissipated into another disaster of a pint from a wine maker who should maybe stick to the grapes.

What I said then (May 7th, 2023) :

Meh...I had low expectations and this met them...

Magnotta Winery also brews beer for some reason and the results over the years have been less than stellar...like this one...True North 4% Light IPA was brewed with Mosaic & Strata Hops and while the promised tropical bouquet never really materializes, it's inoffensive and muted. Light citrus pith, some lemon and grapefruit, rumoured bitterness and a trip to the sink...Cheers? 1.5/5

Pints with Polk YouTube Review : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r_QXdLMK8eA

2. Beau's All Natural Brewing (Steamwhistle) Lug Light 

 

 This one broke my heart. I don't have much to add, I said it all on that April afternoon...

What I said then (April 27th, 2023) : 

I miss Beau's.

And by that, I mean I remember when it seemed every week brought something new to the LCBO from them, interesting ingredients, those seasonal Mix packs, and of course Gruits! Beau's All Natural Brewing formed part of the core of what changed how I saw beer and when I finally got to visit VanKleek Hills in 2016 and take a tour of the Brewery, it felt like a pilgrimage to one of the high holy places of beer. Beau's introduced me to styles of beer I didn't know existed and took crazy chances on things nobody else was doing at the time. I have a weird sort of barley-nostalgia that dates back to the mid 2010's that pulls strong on my crafty beer man soul and while I know all good things change and come to an end eventually, I'm still struggling with what has become of this once gloriously adventurous Brewery. I understand economics and the changing landscape of the craft beer world and honestly was glad to see that Steamwhistle bought Beau's last year rather than have them close or go to a macro Brewer, but this 4% Lug Lite they sent my way is just not the Beau's we know. It's a beer but displays little depth, feeling rushed and just less than. I get light lagers, I have had some real good ones, and this just doesn't get up there. It breaks my damn heart, honestly, I don't wanna be a downer, but I really do miss Beau's...

Taste is subjective, I know, but honesty isn't, and that's all I got.

Pints with Polk YouTube Review : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8r-pdWc4a2w

1. Burlington Brewery Grind Stone Indian Pale Ale

  

 Is this the worst beer I've ever reviewed?

  Yes.

  But is it the worst beer I've ever had?

  Also yes.

  Despite a decent first pint from the newest brewery in Burlington, Ontario, the second offering I picked up was beyond the pale in terms of flaws. It should have never been allowed to leave the bright tank, let alone be canned and sold to the public. It was so offensive in every aspect that the memory of its astringent, vomit like taste still lingers in the back of my mind like a bad memory. People paid good money for this beer and to be honest, I don't think the brewery cares...hell, they blocked me on social media after I called them out and this one response to a Google review about their beer speaks volumes about delusions of grandeur and self importance...

30,000 cans a week? I call bullshit. That location moving that kind of volume would be overrun from open to close. If that was true, they'd be rolling in so much cash, they wouldn't know where to spend it. Imagine, that many cans times even $3...$90,000 a week...$4.68 million dollars in sales, of beer alone, in a year? They'd have to be moving more than 50+ cans a hour for any of this to be true. Where are they storing all this beer? They don't have an LCBO listing...For fuck sakes.

Anyway...on with the shitshow...

What I said then (October 27th, 2023) :

I was always told if I had nothing nice to say, I shouldn't say anything...

Fuck that.

This is not a good beer...astringent, buttery, perfume like, utterly devoid of hop character. Lingers like vomit...I had to go buy whiskey to burn the taste out of my mouth. I'm usually a pretty positive guy, but nobody should drink this beer, nor should it be sold. Not a double IPA, not a discernible style at all. This is not a good second pint from Burlington Brewery, I actually enjoyed their regular IPA, but I am supremely disappointed with whatever this is. Nope. 0/5

Pints with Polk YouTube Review : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jm98gdBsW7Y

  There you have it, my friends, the return of The Disappointments. I am hard at work on the other end of the spectrum to this, The Ten, and hope to have it to you to cleanse your palate of all this nonsense early next week. 

Until then, remember that life is too short to drink bad beer. There is nothing wrong with a drain pour and you don't have to only say nice things because sometimes there is nothing nice to say at all. Honesty is the only policy that matters. 

Its's Show Business, not Show Friends.

Polk 

January 8th, 2024

The Honest Review - Advocating for better beer.

 

   I think we have all been there. You grab a couple new beers at the Liquor store and rush home with your treasures, eagerly anticipating a night of exciting things. Chilled and waiting after dinner, you open the first one and watch the cascade of liquid fill your glass, hoping for the aromas and flavours to match what the brewer has promised. Watching the final drops flick into the foamy head, you sniff and feel like something's off. A little deeper perhaps and still, it comes up short. No worries though, clearly the first sip will reveal the true depth of character this beer has been presented to us with, flavours will surely come forth to justify you spending your beer budget on this exciting looking new beer.
  Except it doesn't and now you aren't sure what to do. Do you keep drinking it, clearly it isn't hitting the style marks or descriptions given to you. The early excitement fades and the promise of a fun night has morphed into a disappointing evening of self doubt and recriminations. You could have stayed with your tried and true craft beer favourites, but you want try new things because that is what this whole thing is really all about. While every beer certainly can't be the very best ever, they should at least hit the level of competent and close to style.

Who wants to go back to the old generic beer days?

 The rush to market feel I have seen recently looks like the tip of the iceberg and this Titanic voyage is just getting started. I can understand people who have been home brewing for years banding together with like minded friends or family and making a go of commercial brewing. Be it as a contract brewer or an actual brick and mortar shop, those dreams are worthy and I support anyone willing to undertake it with an honest and open plan. But we all know the ones that just don't feel right. Slick marketing, glossy photo spreads, product placement for money and a general sense of a disingenuous approach to a community that still feels very grassroots at its base. The heart we so often speak of cannot be found in such places or brands and the slimy feeling you get is because deep down you know what you're drinking.
 There can be some difficulty in trying to separate the real from the fake because it can subjective but the people who make up the strength of the craft beer movement, the drinkers and lovers of well made, independent beer can sense when someone is feeding them bullshit. Poorly made beer that is sent out because they have deadlines or investors isn't just the calling card of a contract brewer, some long term brewers have reputations for sub par releases that make you wonder how gullible we appear. Getting a listing at the LCBO means you've passed some kind of quality control but it doesn't ensure that quality translates into something resembling good, on point beer.  Malty IPAs when they're supposed to be balanced, watery lagers to try and capture that borderline segment who want to experience craft and labels meant to catch the eye but with little in the way of substance inside. I have only found a few of these kinds of pseudo craft beers but I fear the time is upon us when the market fragmentation and the pursuit of a share of a still pretty tiny pie is deluged with witty slogans, artwork and not much substance. My experience buying wine (a story for another day entirely) gave me an inkling what it is like to be new to the scene, relying on labels and descriptions, guided by names that sound like I should know them or perhaps something someone has told me to help influence my purchase.

I'm always learning

  How do we combat this invasion of the flavour snatchers? It starts and ends with us, to be very simplistic. We who have come before must be the voices that sustain the revolution. The advocacy for better beer and more honesty in that must be paramount. The toehold craft has in the overall beer marketplace is solid but not huge and the potential is there for exponential growth in the coming years, but a flood of poorly made or executed beers will turn people off and send them back to the bland, yet always consistent macro brands. Helping your friends who are new to craft beer find good transitional beers that are to style and full of flavour will help stem the tide of gimmicky bullshit that is starting to pop up and can ensure we don't let this cold turn into pneumonia.
  I say we try to keep our social media filled with honest and straightforward discussions about what we are drinking. You will know I am not a person who ever trashes a brewer or even a beer as being intentionally bad. Rather I let the world know that it's not for me, missing some key mark or flavour along the way to explaining why it wasn't a beer I'd buy again. You don't have to be an asshole about it but your friends deserve and will appreciate your opinion when they seek it out. Advocate the best in beer and try to help them when it comes to steering them into beers that match what they like about flavours and textures. Ease them into it, a triple IPA for a dedicated Bud Light drinker isn't doing them or the beer any favours.

It's always been true for me,

 If you're an explorer of craft beer like me, you're going to try every beer you can get your hands on and as long as you try to see them for what they are stylistically rather than trying to attack them, you will help the cause go further with those who are asking your counsel. Let's make the conversation about what is the best side of our beer but not without acknowledging the weak spots and poor decisions we see on the shelves. Call them out, be truthful and always use your words wisely as those who seek your council will be grateful for your candor. Let the light of truth shine on your pursuit and always keep a sense of wonder about just how amazing this time is for people who love great beer.


Cheers!


Polk

Rating and Reviewing - My take on the Numbers

Reviewing like a Boss. Pinky's out baby!

  I often get asked about the ratings I give beer at the end of my Instagram reviews. It comes, of course, from the old days when we used Untappd and scored beers to try and help us remember whether we liked them or not. It has morphed into something different as my palate and education in beer have grown and that is what drives me when I put it to the test in my glass day after day.
 Taste is subjective, people differ on what style and flavours they like and this can be a cause for some difficulty when assigning a numerical value to that latest review. What used to be a "like this beer or not" number has become a test on how closely it matches my understanding of the style as well as how I feel about the beer. An IPA that is super malty or lacks bitter citrus will obviously receive a lower score than one that is well balanced. But what separates a 3.75 from a 4? That is where it gets tricky for me and can have me waffling over the send button on some reviews for a lot longer than you'd think. Here is a brief description of how I feel when assigning the specific numbers to any beer from under 1 to over 4.5.

• Below 1.00 - Not sure what I did to the universe to deserve this punishment. Way off the mark and almost offensive to humanity. A never buy for me and one I actively discourage their production or consumption to all. 
• 1.25 to 2.00 - Any beer below this number is lacking several distinct characteristics stylistically and will not make another appearance in my fridge unless someone buys it for me, even that is pushing it. Not worth your time or money.
• 2.25 to 3.00 - Something about these beers is just a little off. They are not horrible, but they are missing or have too much of something or reached too far and didn't achieve it. Would give another chance, with caution
• 3.25 - Better than average and eminently closer to the mark of what they are. Generally falls because the balance of flavours did not come together quite as well as the style suggests. To be tried again.
• 3.50 - Solid beer, sharable, will buy again. Not outstanding but hitting all the proper marks with decent balance.
• 3.75 - Stepping up with a little better flavour profile. More memorable and the palate is pleased but not blown away. Good beer that will be tried again to explore it further.
• 4.00 - The top end begins here. Balanced and on point for the style. Checks all the boxes for texture, flavour and finish. A candidate for regular pours and recommendations to friends. Buy this beer.
• 4.25 - Now we are talking. This is when beer gets exciting. Standout balance between flavours, above the norm and sought after for repeat purchases. Something special in these beers that makes them stand out from the crowd.
• 4.50 - Simply the best. Everything screams amazing from the pour, sniff and sip. Hitting and exceeding the mark on proper style notes, outstanding flavour and texture with memorable moments all the way through
• 4.75/5.00 - I've never been this lucky or able to appreciate a beer to either of these levels. Perhaps with time I can learn enough to take some of the 4.50 to these heights. Call them Unicorn beers, one day I shall ride the lightning.

  Anyone who reviews beer and gives it a number is always open to criticism and some of that is deserved. Passing judgement on someone else's work is difficult and even more so when you get to know the good people that populate your local craft beer scene. But the honest and open exchange of information and feedback can be helpful to the brewers and I rarely post scathing reviews because it doesn't help anyone to attack or belittle a beer. Ask me privately and I will always tell you the truth, but for beers that don't hit the mark, I generally log them into Untappd and move on, not wanting to waste creativity or my words on a longer review. If I have serious concerns I will and have contacted the brewery directly to seek answers because I always want to know more. If we really are fans of what Craft beer has brought to us, making it a better and more open for discussing things is only going to create a positive place for all.
  I know some people take the reviews I do to heart and will seek out beers I trumpet and avoid ones I pan, so I am conscious of trying to be as honest as I can with everything I write. I know many folks disagree with giving a score at all and I can respect that too. I do what I do because it is part of who I am and how I translate my experience to the world. The rating I give a beer combined with the mood I try to create with the words I use should help to paint a picture that is easy to understand. I take what I create seriously, but never myself. I don't get all caught up in followers, likes or anything of the sort. Writing about beer should always take a backseat to enjoying it and the people who've come into my life are proof of that. My reviews have brought me so many opportunities to meet new people and create friendships with a really diverse group of pretty awesome people. That is what it should always be about, fun and friends with better beer.
  So review your beer any way you want, give it a score or don't, but always be honest about what you taste. Take other people's reviews with a grain of salt and look to those you trust or who you seem to have a similar palate with for suggestions. Remember that what you taste is what it is, so be patient if you're just learning to experience what can found in all the different styles of beer. It took me a long time to get here and I still feel like I have so much more to learn. Take a class, get your Prudhomme or Ciccerone certification to get into what really goes on in your glass. Or just enjoy the fact that we are living in a golden age of beer right now and explore everything your local scene has to offer. Tell a story, take a picture, sing a song or make a video if that's what you want, have fun and create something that shows who you are. I'm going to keep doing it my way because that's what makes me happy. Hope you can stick around because this ride is just getting fired up.


Raise your glass and your standards,
One beer at a time.


Cheers!


Polk

Share your love of beer anyway you want.

 

  When I first started writing and reviewing Craft beer, I had no idea what I was doing. The flavours were new to me and I would research and agonize over every thing I said. I wanted to describe what I was tasting but lacked the knowledge to find just what that was. So I took to the internet and sites such as Beer Advocate, Rate Beer and of course, Untappd. I would drink my beer and read the reviews of other people, acquiring the descriptions of what it was I was tasting and training my palate to find them each time. It took a lot of trial and error, experimenting with actual citrus fruits, dark chocolate, black coffee and other foods to grasp the notes in my beer. It was that kind of insatiable quest for information that helped me to pursue the path I have.  I try to learn more every day because it is in knowing that we can understand not just the beer, but why we drink it and what it can say about us.

  Many people have written me and asked how to get started or to ask questions about my reviews or larger journey. I always love to talk beer and life with anyone who takes the time to ask and it is a real pleasure to help people discover their own specific voice.

 My advice to anyone who wants to review or share their views on craft beer is to do what makes you happy, be open to new things and don't be a snob.  

 Want to write in depth, critical reviews? Do that. Why not go get the proper Ciccerone or Prud'homme training and become the master of beer.

  Want to share what beer you're drinking in a fun and less informative way? Do that and speak with enthusiasm about everything you do.

  Just want to be part of the larger craft community but don't want to get into rating or describing your beer? Do that, share your pics on social media and just be yourself.

  My point is always the same, do what brings you joy, not to please anyone else. I get the odd person who criticizes my flavour description or rating but I don't let that interfere in my process. I taste what I taste and so do you. Beer ratings are highly subjective and while many people don't do it, I will continue because that is what I like to do. Don't feel pressure to rate a beer 1 to 5 or 10 or 100, in the end it only matters if you liked it or didn't. Someone challenges what you taste, tough on them, it is your beer, your palate and you taste what you do. I am always open to an honest discussion about my rating, tasting or love/hate for a beer. If someone wants to have a genuine talk and help bring me information, I am all for it and you should be too. But there is nothing that I tune out quicker than negative or angry people.

  At the end of the day, it is just beer. Great beer, but still just a beer nonetheless. I do wax poetic on the subject and feel an affinity for the industry because it has truly changed my life. But you should never feel like your review or sharing of your thoughts or pics doesn't matter. It is a community that thrives when there are more voices, more stories and more opportunities to learn and grow.

  So take that picture of your beer on the table while you watch TV, head outside and get arty if you want or just drink it, it's really up to you. Sharing your beer and thoughts on social media is a great way to meet new people, it encourages you to find new and different beers, explore the local breweries for the latest releases and become part of something that is bigger than you are. I love it when someone is just starting out and they connect with me, I want to be the voice of happiness and encouragement for anyone who is brave enough to share a piece of who they are and if you follow along on my Facebook page (click here), you will see that I am constantly sharing the blogs, videos and reviews of other people. I am a firm believer in the people of Craft beer and am overjoyed to help them spread their voice to a wider audience.

  There are those who have an opposite view, looking only to themselves and leaving the wider community in the background, insisting on their own perfection or omniscience as the only beer writer/reviewer that matters. I see this and know that not only are they setting themselves up to be left behind but they are missing out on all the amazing people in the craft beer world. My life has been made infinitely better because I share so much of who I am. I believe in being humble, open and friendly because that is what I want in return. One of my favourite beer writers, Ben Johnson, told me to always be honest and that is exactly what I try to do. Give people an unblemished account of your beer experience and they can see that right away. Be not afraid to say what you mean, but try to be a good person about it. Negativity, sexism and anger only bring more of the same into your life and while I have made mistakes, I recognize, apologize and change with the acquisition of more knowledge. Grow, learn and always give the best you have to anything you share.

  It is the beer that brings so many people of different background and lifestyles together under one hoppy roof and I have met people and done things I couldn't even imagine. So if you're thinking of starting a blog, video, Instagram account or any other social media to share your love of craft beer, I encourage you to do it.

  Don't do it because you think you'll make money, get famous or are better than anyone else. Do it because you love great beer, the folks who drink it and the people who make it. Give a little of yourself to this wonderful community and it will come back tenfold.

  Below is a list of some of 20 of the writers and beer reviewers I love to follow and share. There are literally hundreds of great people but I wanted to keep it short, so my apologies to anyone I missed. Check them out, follow along and then join the craft beer world yourself, it's such a great place to be!

Beer Writer - Website (2 other social media)

Ben Johnson - Ben's Beer Blog (Facebook, Twitter)

Crystal Luxmore, Tara Luxmore, Erica Campbell - The Beer Sisters (Facebook, YouTube)

Adam Kemp - The Brew Head (Facebook, YouTube)

Robin Leblanc - The Thirsty Wench (Twitter)

Jordan St. John - Saint John's Wort (Twitter)

Don Redmond - Brew Ha Ha (Twitter)

Mike Burton, Matthew Renda, Beth Hughes - The Bottomless Pint (Twitter (Mike, Matthew, Beth)

Glenn Hendry - IPA Tales (Twitter)

Steven Beaumont - Beaumont Drinks (Twitter)

Chad McGee - The Albino Rhino (Facebook, YouTube)

Tiffany Martin - The Travelling Pint (Facebook, YouTube)

Christophe Paquette, Max Monet - Hops & Bros (Facebook, YouTube)

Paul Meloff - Paul the Beer Guy (Facebook, Twitter)

Some of my Instagram friends who are just killing it with their photos and reviews -

Phil C. - Keltic Devil

Sean A. - Moonstone Brewer

Brett H. - I Find Beer Enjoyable

Southern Ontario Beer Boys

Michael K. - Michael Kras

Ryan, Nathan, Dave - RND Blast

Robin C. - Beer Core Droid

 

There are so many more, have a look around and you will find your own favourites.

Raise your glass and your standards,

One Beer at a time.

Cheers!

Polk