Reflections on 1000 Days of Beer

 

Thinkin' about drinkin'

When I first started writing about my experiences with beer in 2015, chronicling the journey I was taking through the styles and flavours I had never experienced, I was wide eyed and optimistic. I curtailed my internal temptation towards negativity and focused instead on the positive and exciting things happening here in the Ontario Craft beer scene. I wrote about past mistakes and triumphs, rated and reviewed over 2600 beers and filmed more than 700 videos. New friends were made and some old ones lost, jobs have changed and even my outlook on life has been shaped by the liquid in my glass.

The olden days of Brava Light Polk

  It is not merely that I have drank and reviewed at least one beer every day for 1000 days, it is the very fundamental difference this community, it's purveyors and consumers alike, have had on me. I have changed, found solace once again in the expressing of myself through various mediums, all of them art to me on one level or another.  I was a smart kid but I didn't understand how to express myself once I left school. Adults, especially men, just get on with the business of living and providing, leaving behind the notion of sharing your emotions or thoughts with the world. Craft beer changed all that.

One of my first (and still) craft beer loves

  I found an outlet for talking about my past, addressing demons long held at bay by alcohol and poor decisions. I recognized the empty promises I made to myself and others about life and made attempts to change that as I went forward. To create, design or write about beer, sports, history or any of a myriad of subjects that interested me was almost as intoxicating as the beer I was drinking and no doubt the positive feedback and encouragement I found online was a factor in my continued pursuit.
  It hasn't been all sunshine and saisons though. I know drinking a beer everyday isn't a big deal, but the ones where that becomes four or five can come a little too frequent for my liking and I can acknowledge the fact that I am at the very least, a functional sort of alcoholic. Do I need a beer every day? I'd say the yearning to get hammered daily has dissipated somewhat in the last 1000 days and more and more it is but one beer pouring into my world each evening. But still there persists a thirst for the darkness I once had guiding me through life and I will have to stand on guard as long as I continue to use beer as a form of self expression.
  I don't miss any work, excuse myself from events because I can't drink there or use beer to mask anger or fear at the day. I know exactly what I was before this all started and have no desire to return to the days of blackouts, emptiness and the sad existence of a drunk. But still I want to enjoy at least a pint at the end of my day and that is probably not something normal folks do for as long as I have.
  My weight, such as it is, has fluctuated from a low of 270 pounds to the not so impressive 330 I'm packing now. Although I've cut far back from the days of pounding 12 tall boys of Old Milwaukee 5 or 6 days a week, I'm still taking on a lot of empty calories for a man in his mid 40's. No doubt my current job played a little in the weight gain, I've put on 30 pounds in the last year as my dinner hour pushed back the clock until almost 8 p.m. every night, combined with a pint or two a few hours before bed and little exercise. So that will be something I either address within my own sphere or I will have it forced upon me when the inevitable physical breakdowns happen. I've been scared of what my inability to lose weight will do to me as I get older and although I know I need to move more, our old pal anxiety can keep me on the couch longer than any beer could.
  I will say that being able to transform an Instagram account about beer with a funny name attached to it into a forum for mental health and expression has been my biggest surprise about the last 1000 days. I have learned that I am not alone and have built up a fine network of friends in real life and online that helps to prop me up when I cannot stand and leads me to light when I cannot see. This alone has been worth every pint poured or picture taken. The people who have reached out with their own stories and advice have been tremendous and I am grateful for that most of all.

It feels like art to me

  There have been bumps along the way, some people don't like how I rate beer, or talk about my life and the reality of what I am living. Some just don't like me and despite my incredibly insecure need to please everyone, I have learned to let them go. Life is too short to try and be everything to everyone. I will continue to share my beer and my stories with the world, poetry and videos will always make me feel better and I have no doubt in my ability to continue to seek answers for life's questions as I go along.
  I guess the entire 1000 days was a set up, a trip with peaks and valleys, a journey through life with beer as a catalyst to spark my creative side. I write and talk from a place of emotion, heart on my sleeve and a definite lean towards the positive of every situation. I feel the darkness just below the surface but it has weakened over time as I find more ways to express myself and release the emotions I kept bottled up for so long. I'm not sure this is something for everyone, but for me, this has been exactly what I needed to learn to live again.

1000 Days to find this beauty

  Will I not have a beer someday soon? The honest answer is I don't know but to really look hard at myself, I don't see why I should stop enjoying at least one pint a day. Maybe a few less days with more than one is in order, on this I can agree. But for now, I'll keep writing and drinking, sharing my thoughts with the world, one beer at a time.


Here's to another 1000 days!

Cheers!


Polk

A better Polk I'll be

   At some point in the last three years I bought my last two-four of macro beer and didn't know it. I wasn't aware of it nor did I make that a conscious decision. It happened while I was still drinking rather heavily but I didn't plan on it nor could I have understood the transformation I was embarking upon.
  I've been known as an outspoken, even cruel critic of macro beers as my baptism into craft beer finally took hold and I went through the evangelical phase with a gusto I used to reserve for when we'd bring out the dual funnel and I'd chug 4 Brava lights in under 15 seconds. I railed against pseudo craft in all it's iterations and heaped scorn on those who would indulge the perceived evil that was Goose Island or Mill Street. It was as though I took my dismissal of the better beer I had shunned for years in pursuit of the cheapest drunk I could find and channeled it into bringing that rage down on anyone I deemed not true craft beer.
  I have struggled for most of my adult life with poor impulse control and made decisions that left me scrambling to live. I turned to beer because it fit my persona as a party guy who didn't give a fuck about anything and even as my personal Rome came burning down around my head, I continued to plunge head long into binge drinking that left me shaking my head when I'd wake up after another lost evening.
  Since my journey into craft beer, I have developed my palate and continue to refine it every day. It was a pleasure to leave behind the bland and boring Old Milwaukee and MGD and explore hoppy IPAs, fruity Saisons and so on. But I still woke far too many mornings with a hole in my memory and some great beers drunk in the blackout that I would never see again. The quality and cost of my beers had changed but I had not truly left my old self behind, I was just hiding behind the façade of craft beer and continuing my destructive ways.
  In May of 2017, I counted and posted every single beer I drank that month and was kind of flummoxed that the final tally numbered 150. No doubt a little spurred on by trying to raise the total and be cool about it, I nonetheless took action to be more conservative in my consumption and started to have less of my go to craft beers in the fridge and focus on trying to review everything I consumed but not overdoing it. There were indeed a few more moments of ridiculous behaviour but slowly I could feel the tide turning and as of the last few months, I haven't truly been outside the norm when it comes to consumption. A couple a night with perhaps 3 or 4 on my night off and that seems to be it for this old fella. The desire to slip into a beer induced haze has left me and all I feel the need for now is to experience every single nuance and subtle note my beer has to offer.
  So how does this tie into my not buying macro beer anymore? Well, what I discovered was that while a large part of what I do is all about supporting the local craft brewers and encouraging others to do the same, it is also about drinking less and enjoying more. I shun events where the goal is mass consumption, regardless of the participating breweries. Let's face it, the only reason your going to a beer fest is to get snackered in the guise of trying all the beer. I don't want to beer shame people anymore (well except green beer, that stuff is so nasty), but I also wont buy it because it serves no purpose except to intoxicate as multiples of any beer seem to be the antithesis of everything I stand for. No one buys a single can of Pabst for the flavour, it's designed to deliver the 5% in a crisp and clean boring lager that has you reaching for another one so much you might just be DJ Khaled. So I don't buy macro anymore because it doesn't suit my needs, it gives me nothing to think about and certainly doesn't help me support my local community or engage in my favourite pastime of reviewing and talking about beer.
  I am trying to be a little better about letting people enjoy the things they want without crapping on them and I'd like to think I am succeeding. I no longer have room in my fridge or glass for anything I don't want to explore and I am confident that I have seen enough broken mornings with the empties to prove it that I no longer need to purchase any of the big boys of beer. But drink what you want and I'll still be here doing my thing, bringing the best I can find and shining a light on things that maybe aren't quite right. I'll drink a 50 when I'm at the legion and maybe a Mill Street if that's what is available but if I'm given the option, I'll choose true craft every time, be the DD or have a nice full bodied Red Wine instead. The choice is yours and I will do my utmost to respect it.


Cheers!


Polk

Ramblings of a Polkaroo

Polkaroo across the Internet with this beautiful shot!

It has been a real treat the last couple of weeks since Polkapolooza. Between all the new beer, friends and brewery visits, I've been pretty busy. Getting the chance to sit down and write a post here is hard for two reasons. One is that I spend an increasing amount of time either writing reviews on Instagram, making videos on my YouTube Channel or hanging out with friends drinking and sharing great beer. The other reason is that I am also trying to get my thoughts about my entire life's journey from childhood till now put into coherent form. Part of what makes the Drunk Polkaroo tick is acknowledging the past and using my experiences and mistakes to plan a brighter future. It's not always pretty and I struggle with some of the darker times. There are pieces of my life that even I had forgotten about or repressed because they are such a sad and bleak time. But it is in utilizing those very intense encounters with the very worst of my life that I tread the path I do now. So while I started this blog not really knowing where I was going and with such a gusto of writing every day, I did not come all this way to abandon any part of my story. I may not write daily or weekly here, but you can always find some part of my life through my other outlets.

The biggest part of what has driven this whole thing is great beer. Taking the time to write and talk about it really has made a difference to what I drink and more importantly, how I drink. My very best Beer Friend is BigCanuck75 (check out his Instagram, all sorts of awesome) and we were also partners in cramming macro lagers until we couldn't stand back not so long ago. Last night we got together and neither of us had to work in the morning. That used to mean a 24 or two and we would be feeling it for the next few days with blurred vision and pounding headaches. But we had a couple of beers each, talked about all manner of things and enjoyed the hell out the evening. Respecting the beer and fun are not incompatible anymore and it was so nice to wake up this morning to enjoy breakfast with Mrs. Polkaroo and no hangover.

So fear not my friends, just because I don't post here everyday doesn't mean you can't read about my adventures. Please join us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or YouTube to get all sorts of fun beer related content. I am working on putting it all together on one website with some other cool stuff that people have suggested they'd like to see. Luckily I have awesome family like my cousin Matt, who purchased the Drunkpolkaroo.com website for me and set up all the links that take you to my various mediums. I am blessed most of the time with being surrounded by supportive real life and online friends. I hope your ready because there are some really wicked fun coming up soon and maybe you can come along and join the Drunk Polkaroo in his adventure!
I would be remiss if I didn't mention the still early in the planning Tabernac! The Qubec City Craft Beer Throwdownaolooza that is happening in August. It has come from meeting people on Instagram and sharing our love of great beer, We all kept saying that it would be cool to actually have a beer together, so we took the leap, found the most central place for us to meet and agreed it was high time we get together. It is going to be pretty amazing and I hope we can add more beer friends to the guest list. Details coming very soon, join us on our Facebook group to keep up to date with the latest ideas.
Until we meet again my friends!
Raise your glass and your standards one beer at a time!
Cheers! 



Why are my Instagram Posts so Long?

Artsy!

I am a naturally "wordy" person. I love to talk about just about anything, but to be honest, Craft Beer has become my passion and if you've been following along at home, you know why. My life has been transformed by these tasty and well made beers and I can't help but share that love with the world.

All this means one thing. When I post a review on Instagram, it can go a little long. I mean I've bumped into their character limit many times and it isn't small like the 140 you get on Twitter. Most people just double tap and scroll along when they are on this app, but I always make sure I read whatever is written because I am trying to find out anything about the beer in the picture, the brewery that made it and the person behind the account. I have been surprised by how many people I have met through the simple act of sharing pictures on a social media site. I suppose I shouldn't be, but being a person who struggles with anxiety means I often times miss out on things. On Instagram, I didn't have to leave my home to share stories, support my beer friends and even make new ones. This picture sharing site has helped me weather the winter in a relatively positive mood and it is due in part to those people who take the time to not only check out my pictures, but actually make their way through the often long winded stories that come from my beer.

 So back to the original premise of why are my Instagram posts so long. I would like to think it is because I can't control myself and get lost in the moment and to some extent that is true. But the most basic reason I will try to link the new beer I am drinking to a story from my life is that it helps me to slow down and appreciate everything about the brew. It makes me consider what I am drinking and not just reach into the fridge for another...and another...and another. I still feel the strong pull of just getting snackered on cheap beer and I know I have to remain vigilant against sliding back into that oblivion. Crafting a narrative about what is happening now or in the past and relating it to the picture I am taking or the name of the beer takes time and that is what I need.

  Along with expanding from just talking about the flavours and textures of my beer to tying it together with my past, present and even future in the description, I have been bitten by the artistic photo bug. I was never a "artsy" person, not surprisingly more of a wordsmith, so I have a ways to go to be as good as some of the people I follow in terms of presentation. But I really feel like I am stepping my game up every time. I am learning about lighting, depth, framing and other interesting photography related things. It has become a real challenge to think about how I want to present my beer and then tie it into a story I want to tell. This is how I bring calm to the chaos and reel in my old Polkaroo ways. 

Snow Beers!

   Perhaps the best part of all of this site has been the events I've attended and actual new friends I have made. When I decided to start this blog, do reviews on Instagram and subsequently post video reviews on YouTube, I did not think it would lead to helping me crack out of my shell and start to experience life again. I am grateful for the new people I have met in person and online and hope to widen that circle as the weather warms and we can get together on a patio somewhere for some delicious craft beer.

Going to breweries to get new beers, refill my growlers and pick up a new pint glass has become something I look forward to every day off. Ontario Craft Brewers not only make great beer, they have a passion for what they do and that translates into a great experience when you visit them. They are so welcoming and for the most part will talk about their brews all day if you have the time.

  So whether you just scroll on after the double tap to leave a heart or read all the way through and leave a comment, I thank you. Without this amazing community of Craft Beer enthusiasts and supporters, I wouldn't have found my voice again. My journey is truly just beginning and having new friends, old friends and great beer come together makes this Polkaroo's heart sing.

  That's an idea. Maybe I should start a singing beer review page. I do love a good tune......

Cheers and Thank you once again for following along!