I go on...

 

No beer, no sunglasses, no barrier between you and I.

I'm closing in on half a century faster than I can imagine, quicker than I could think possible and when I look around me, I'm struck by the incredible luck that has landed me here. I've screwed up more times than I can count, blown chances and been down for the count so often, I'm never sure when things are truly good or bad, I'm waiting for the next shoe to drop and the cycle to begin again. 

I've seen my entire life get thrown aside, had the heat turned off in the dead of winter and my phone cut because I couldn't afford the bill. I've borrowed from Peter to pay Paul and then borrowed from Paul to pay back Peter. I've seen shit go down and been right to the fucking edge of walking off the ledge and never looking back...

But still I am here.

That message of never losing hope, of seeking help when you need it and of looking for some way, any way up from the depths of darkness mean a lot to me. I have been to the precipice of the abyss, stared right in the eye of the devil and turned back to live another day. 

I know a lot of folks are just about beer and how awesome things are on this app, I get it, I know that feeling. But after almost 6 years of doing this every day, I know that it means nothing without the truth of real life behind it. People question my "ratings" of a beer never stop to think maybe I'm just real fucking happy to be alive to enjoy that beer and damned if I'm not gonna embrace that feeling to the limit. I've made and lost friends because of silly shit, I've said goodbye to people I love a lot but who felt I was such a mess they couldn't stick around to watch and I can't be mad at that, because I'm not easy, I'm not going to change and I'm here until the time comes that I'm no longer here...

Take care of yourself, step back and make sure you're okay, I'm always here to talk, I'm always here to help make it less hard to be a person on this little.blue ball we call home. Beer is great, but you gotta be here to enjoy it, so stick around and let's see what happens next.

The darkness is real, but you and I can step back, lean into the light and try to make it work, life goes on...as do I.

Polk