I struggle a little with the #BellLetsTalk every year and I wonder if there are more people like me out there who are unsure of how to discuss about what it means to see our timelines flooded with well meaning, but sometimes offkey attempts to talk about mental health. I see the people who rant about Bell's terrible corporate track record when it comes to their own employees and the small drop in the bucket this campaign raises in relation to their enormous profits. I understand that Bell operates the prison phone system and exploits those already burdened by having an incarcerated family member and just trying to stay in touch. None of this kind of quasi-bad guy, mostly terrible stuff is not lost on me, no corporation is in the business of doing anything but what it is legally obligated to do and that is to maximize returns on investments for its shareholders. I have no doubt that there exists a lot of positive spin and increased profit found by Bell when this campaign runs every year, even with the larger donations gathered by the use of the hashtag on multiple social media platforms.
Every one of these things is true and yet I still wonder if, despite the underlying corporate bullshit, it isn't still worth something to at least try to reach out to those who feel like there is nothing left for them here on this often seemingly uncaring and chaotic planet. Seeing your favourite athlete or brewery or what have you addressing the issue of mental health may spark hope in someone, it may give them the feeling they maybe aren't alone in this. Maybe it gets them talking to a friend, or to pick up the phone and call a crisis line. Maybe, just maybe, having a large and very visible campaign aimed at increasing the normalcy of asking for help and of checking in on your friends and family to see how they are doing may have some positives attached to it, despite the originators ultimate advertising aims.
I've spent the better part of the last decade struggling, often in silence, to try and fix my own mental health issues. I didn't wake up one day falling apart, it was a quiet and measured descent as I watched my business fail and the life I thought I had crumble around me. It was the slow bleed of stress, working longer hours for less money and an devastating downfall from the highs of my 20's and 30's. I gave up most things that brought me joy, let decades long friendships dwindle and die and generally stopped celebrating the milestones of life most people mark the passing year with. I still feel the push of that negative thought process, birthdays and anniversaries are heavy because it often feels like another step closer to the end of it all. That kind of darkness is hard to fight by yourself and as you become more isolated because you know how to push people away because it is safer in your mind to be alone so no one can ever hurt you, you descend deeper into that funk. You turn to alcohol, drugs or other potentially destructive behaviours that seemingly ease the pain of the moment with little regard to the future, because it doesn't matter. Nothing does and you see no way up, no way out and the numbness sets in with every single turn of the cap, pill or shot. This pattern may be different with you or someone you love, but the result in the end is the same, a depression that lifts less and less each time and can drive people to the edge and over it because hope is all but gone.
So, how do we fix it? How do you stop someone from hurting themselves or those around them when they see no alternative? It's much bigger than just a single day or hashtag campaign by a large corporation and their partners. It involves governments prioritizing the mental health of its' citizens as much as their physical one. It involves active engagement in the lives of those we love and it involves being honest with ourselves when we know we need help. Asking for someone to listen to your problems and concerns is hard at the best of times, I personally was always worried about bothering anyone and that kept me silent for many years before this. We seek to normalize the notion that it is okay to not be okay and things like therapy and medical help for our mental health should be a bigger priority for not just our families but our workplaces. We look to making the world a little more compassionate to those who need it or a taking a day when you just need a break from it all. We want to be able to look the people we love in the eye and tell them we aren't handling something well and need a shoulder to lean on or an ear to listen without judgement.
There is no quick fix or easy way to help one another outside of being there and reaching out to make sure the people we love are okay. While a day like today is good and makes a whole lot of money for mental health initiatives, we need to remember that tomorrow and the next day and forever after that. Way too many people fall between the cracks of our social safety net and I know we don't want to lose someone because we waited too long to see that they were suffering in silence. Reach out to them, they may be too scared to do it themselves. Making our collective response to the mental health crisis we are facing today a positive and open one one because the world is better when we can help each other stand up and feel better.
We want to talk about mental health, depression, suicide and self harm with an open honesty and despite the corporatization of mental health, the end result is we may be better off at least attempting to keep the conversation going long after this annual initiative has passed. Are there empty platitudes rolled out every year by a variety of brands and people who then recede into the background and often contribute to the problems we face rather than the solution? Of course and it is up to us as consumers to be informed and spend our money where we can support the places that truly value their employees mental and physical well being. At the end of it all, the hashtag can't be the whole conversation, it should just be the beginning...
Be safe and be kind.
Polk
